I just watched this. I was still in the Philippines when this was shown in theaters in 2002. Oh wow, I didn't really know that it was a true story. Of course, after reading what happened to Frank Abagnale Jr at the end of the movie, I looked him up in google. What an interesting movie and interesting man, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Abagnale.
People deserve second chances. People make mistakes but we can always prove our worth to this world as long as we persevere.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Saturday, June 23, 2007
My First...
A list of the first things I've ever done in the States:
- Drive
- Ask a man out (but of course I felt that there was something there, hehehe)
- Buy my own car
- Live completely by myself
- Buy a game console for myself
- Colour my own hair
- Follow up on a job after an interview
- Ask for a raise (since in the companies that I worked for back home, they give you a review yearly)
- Buy a bed
- Start a blog
- Design a shirt (not good though)
- Buy Converse shoes and lots of them (I had one pair when I was little but it was from my Dad)
- Say I love you first without expecting to hear it back
- Break my patterns
- Drive far and go to a Casino by myself (I lost though, hahahaha but it was fun)
- Walk to work
- Ride the bus constantly to work for one and a half year
- Send a balikbayan box
- Be an OFW and send remittances
- Write first a stranger in friendster but with connection (not a man, ok?)
- Touch a dog owned by a stranger (Dogs at home bite big time but here, they're really treated as babies although big/ugly dogs still scare me)
- Cook caldereta
- Cook an entree for a man
- Bring dinner to a man when he's busy working
- Seize the day
- Cry in a bus
- Put a light bulb (just 20 minutes ago, it's funny huh?)
- Build/assemble a cabinet (small one only)
- Wash my own sheets (Normally I would have these picked up back home or a helper took care of these)
- Spend $800 for a one time visit to a dentist (I hate this one!)
- Work as a server in a small food place
- Work 2 jobs
- Sleep on an airbed in the living room for more than 6months
- Have a break up over the phone and do not see that guy ever again
- Kiss a guy that I'm not really dating
- Buy myself an expesive purse (that most women do all the time)
- Buy a coffee table
- Buy a wine for my own use at home (I haven't drunk actually)
- Think of dying
- Question the existence of God (or maybe it was always there but people back home don't say these things freely)
- Play texas hold'em poker
- Create a Friday group at work (way gone)
- Write constantly
- Love writing even when I'm not good at it
- Subscribe to a magazine
- Fight for what I feel
To be continued once I think of more.
Friday, June 22, 2007
Look Around
Wow! I'm watching The Correspendents in TFC and I feel guilty for even feeling sad for the past few days. They're featuring a mobile teacher who rides the tricycle, rides the jeep for 3 hours and walks so far to the mountain just to teach the Igorots there. Normally she leaves her place at 9:30am, gets to her destination by 9:30pm and teaches her students the following day. She even has her meals cooked and packed good for two days (just one ulam, adobo in a plastic bag). Take note these Igorots are old people who never went to school when they were younger. She is earning $200 for such a hard task and she has been doing this for more than eight years. Oh wow, but it looks like it really gives her happiness and satisfaction to help these people. I always have and will always have big respect for teachers actually.
Sometimes, we really have to look around and appreciate the simple joys in life. I was complaining to myself that I'm alone again on a Friday night,to think that I chose this actually and only to realize that my night is not even enough to do the things I want to do. There's so much to life no matter where we are and no matter how stranger we feel in certain places.
Thank you guys again for reminding me how good and strong I am... that I'm actually doing great despite the storms that came. For making me feel worthy... For making me feel loved... For making me realize to look around... to look at the bright side... to feel great once again... to smile... and just to be me. :)
Sometimes, we really have to look around and appreciate the simple joys in life. I was complaining to myself that I'm alone again on a Friday night,to think that I chose this actually and only to realize that my night is not even enough to do the things I want to do. There's so much to life no matter where we are and no matter how stranger we feel in certain places.
Thank you guys again for reminding me how good and strong I am... that I'm actually doing great despite the storms that came. For making me feel worthy... For making me feel loved... For making me realize to look around... to look at the bright side... to feel great once again... to smile... and just to be me. :)
Thursday, June 21, 2007
No Reason to Feel Blue
Alright, there's no reason for me to feel blue. I woke up so feeling down and even wanted to give up here, quit my job and just go home. I was actually feeling this again since Monday. I need not explain but I guess as my cousin said when someone throws me lemon, make lemonade. I actually want lemon squares cuz. :)
I should focus on the good side of life and the learnings after the storm. I think it is also good to accept being weak at times (who doesn't anyway?) but you have to be able to get out of it. I felt weak that I even called him coz he knew what was going on , why I was feeling sad this week and true enough, he gave me a good advice and yes, he's right, I know myself better than what other people think. I'm not in grade school anymore who would listen to what people say about me just to put me down. When I checked my e-mail, Ate Eileen and Denise sent me mails and they really care about me. Gosh, my sister, finding time to write a long e-mail means a lot coz she's really a busy lady. I also had a good lunch with other four coworkers and nice to hear new stories. My day was busy at work and I feel positive about this new company that I'm managing the finances. Also, Ronnie said we're going to Hawaii by the end of August to early September. I'm excited now. Another coworker gave me a good travel tips and ways to try new things. I'm actually thinking of spending Christmas in Key West, Florida with or without someone and just have fun and celebrate my big 30 there. :) And awww my cuz Joy really loves me, look at what she wrote: http://idioxinecrasies.com/cheer-up-219.html#more-219 .
I know myself... I love myself... and there are a lot of good reasons to live... I'm almost there to what I want and need... and things will be a lot easier... I will see my family soon... I will have more options... I win some, I lose some and there's always time to win and learn from my losses. I remember the book, Dare to Fail ... and yes, we shouldn't be afraid to fail coz everytime we do, we're closer to success.
I should focus on the good side of life and the learnings after the storm. I think it is also good to accept being weak at times (who doesn't anyway?) but you have to be able to get out of it. I felt weak that I even called him coz he knew what was going on , why I was feeling sad this week and true enough, he gave me a good advice and yes, he's right, I know myself better than what other people think. I'm not in grade school anymore who would listen to what people say about me just to put me down. When I checked my e-mail, Ate Eileen and Denise sent me mails and they really care about me. Gosh, my sister, finding time to write a long e-mail means a lot coz she's really a busy lady. I also had a good lunch with other four coworkers and nice to hear new stories. My day was busy at work and I feel positive about this new company that I'm managing the finances. Also, Ronnie said we're going to Hawaii by the end of August to early September. I'm excited now. Another coworker gave me a good travel tips and ways to try new things. I'm actually thinking of spending Christmas in Key West, Florida with or without someone and just have fun and celebrate my big 30 there. :) And awww my cuz Joy really loves me, look at what she wrote: http://idioxinecrasies.com/cheer-up-219.html#more-219 .
I know myself... I love myself... and there are a lot of good reasons to live... I'm almost there to what I want and need... and things will be a lot easier... I will see my family soon... I will have more options... I win some, I lose some and there's always time to win and learn from my losses. I remember the book, Dare to Fail ... and yes, we shouldn't be afraid to fail coz everytime we do, we're closer to success.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Sorry Friends...
I'm sorry my dear friends if I have not replied to your e-mails lately. I'm a little bit in the low side and I might not have better things to say. Thank you so much though for all the care and your e-mails/messages are very much appreciated.
My mind, heart and spirit are too tired to comprehend. I can not understand why when I'm making a progress, other unexpected events pull me down.
My mind, heart and spirit are too tired to comprehend. I can not understand why when I'm making a progress, other unexpected events pull me down.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Getting There
I think I'm getting there... to being a happy person and to loving myself more. There's only one person who truly knows me and that's ME. That's one thing I totally discovered here in the States.
My friend sent me this...
A friend sent me this. She got this from Philippine Star and it's kinda true. She knows we understand and agree to this...
Alone and aliveNEW BEGINNINGS By Büm D. Tenorio, Jr. Sunday, June 10, 2007
Gone are the days when single people hurry up to take the plunge and splash the world with their new status: married. Many young people now enjoy their youth. They enjoy it a lot that even if they reach their 30s, they seem to be unmindful of the ticking of the marital clock. (Wait till you meet ladies who are way past their 30s and yet not bothered by their ticking biological time clock.) Not everyone is in a rush to sprint past the finish line of being unattached, to some extent being uncommitted. Single-blessedness rules. In many cases, it's more of a rule rather than an exemption.
Not that there's a scarcity of compatible couples. Compatibility figures in as much as the relationship is concerned but to bring it to the level of exchanging "I do's" is all together another ball game. And in this ball game, the sweethearts are not only the players but also the referees of their own desires. So, even if they are of ripe age to get married, they just dribble around and delay the game before it leads them to the altar.
But love is not a game. Really, no one says it so. But getting married, for many, is not the answer. Not yet. Especially for those who want to remain single and enjoy its many blessings.
Such selfishness, you say. But it's a choice, we, members of the single society, say.
Economics figures in. When you're in love, you think in numbers, too. Because to raise a family entails financial obligations, many single people - of course those who are into amorous relationships - think twice before they take the bait of sharing one life, one love together. I may be single but I am not alien to the fact that many marriages collapse because of empty pocket and growling stomach. This is a sad reality considering that it is in the vows that "for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse" couple must stick together. But love alone will not suffice. There should be at least food on the table. So, the many single people now who feel they are not yet ready for the altar date do not push the issue. They work and save and spend. The cycle continues. The wedding bells can wait. If ever they will ring at all.
The yearning for a prolonged freedom and independence also contributes why many remain single. These people enjoy being unattached to the max. Psychiatrists call them simply as not the marrying type.
* * *
Many times I have been asked whether I am married or not. The 35-year-old in me always has this reply: "I am very much single but happily engaged... to myself."
This repartee surely elicits laughter from me and the people who ask me. My laughter, however, fades with this follow up question: "Hindi ka ba natatakot na tatanda kang mag-isa (Are you not afraid that you will grow old alone)?"
No. And that's what I always answer. Not because it is convenient for me to say "No" but because I sincerely believe in my conviction that I am not afraid to be alone.
It's not lonely to be alone.
What's with the word "alone" that makes people's mind meander to a world mantled by dark and dreary mood? Why does being alone always have to be equated with isolation, solitary confinement, feelings that are akin to being despondent and disconsolate?
I repeat, risking myself to sound like a broken record, it's not lonely to be alone.
People who say it's lonely to be alone surely have not yet experienced how to be fully happy. They have, perhaps, never realized yet that being single does not necessarily mean being empty. It is having a relationship with the self. Because you are well attuned to yourself, you know your needs. Those who do not have a healthy relationship with the self will always find the faults of the world instead of appreciating its many charms.
To be alone means to tread the path to self-realization, to nurture the road to enlightenment, to traverse the discovery of self-actualization. It is perhaps because of these that the word single-blessedness came into existence.
To be single and alone also means to be alive. It does not connote that the highway to the happily-ever-after is a far-fetched idea. The concept of "he" or "she," as oppose to "they," live(s) happily ever after is a congruent realization for someone whose fairy tale land is not peopled by any character but himself or herself only. Loving yourself to wholeness can be achieved even if you're alone. Lest you forget, you owe it to yourself to create your own happiness.
Single and alone? Fret not. Feel free to love yourself.
Alone and aliveNEW BEGINNINGS By Büm D. Tenorio, Jr. Sunday, June 10, 2007
Gone are the days when single people hurry up to take the plunge and splash the world with their new status: married. Many young people now enjoy their youth. They enjoy it a lot that even if they reach their 30s, they seem to be unmindful of the ticking of the marital clock. (Wait till you meet ladies who are way past their 30s and yet not bothered by their ticking biological time clock.) Not everyone is in a rush to sprint past the finish line of being unattached, to some extent being uncommitted. Single-blessedness rules. In many cases, it's more of a rule rather than an exemption.
Not that there's a scarcity of compatible couples. Compatibility figures in as much as the relationship is concerned but to bring it to the level of exchanging "I do's" is all together another ball game. And in this ball game, the sweethearts are not only the players but also the referees of their own desires. So, even if they are of ripe age to get married, they just dribble around and delay the game before it leads them to the altar.
But love is not a game. Really, no one says it so. But getting married, for many, is not the answer. Not yet. Especially for those who want to remain single and enjoy its many blessings.
Such selfishness, you say. But it's a choice, we, members of the single society, say.
Economics figures in. When you're in love, you think in numbers, too. Because to raise a family entails financial obligations, many single people - of course those who are into amorous relationships - think twice before they take the bait of sharing one life, one love together. I may be single but I am not alien to the fact that many marriages collapse because of empty pocket and growling stomach. This is a sad reality considering that it is in the vows that "for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse" couple must stick together. But love alone will not suffice. There should be at least food on the table. So, the many single people now who feel they are not yet ready for the altar date do not push the issue. They work and save and spend. The cycle continues. The wedding bells can wait. If ever they will ring at all.
The yearning for a prolonged freedom and independence also contributes why many remain single. These people enjoy being unattached to the max. Psychiatrists call them simply as not the marrying type.
* * *
Many times I have been asked whether I am married or not. The 35-year-old in me always has this reply: "I am very much single but happily engaged... to myself."
This repartee surely elicits laughter from me and the people who ask me. My laughter, however, fades with this follow up question: "Hindi ka ba natatakot na tatanda kang mag-isa (Are you not afraid that you will grow old alone)?"
No. And that's what I always answer. Not because it is convenient for me to say "No" but because I sincerely believe in my conviction that I am not afraid to be alone.
It's not lonely to be alone.
What's with the word "alone" that makes people's mind meander to a world mantled by dark and dreary mood? Why does being alone always have to be equated with isolation, solitary confinement, feelings that are akin to being despondent and disconsolate?
I repeat, risking myself to sound like a broken record, it's not lonely to be alone.
People who say it's lonely to be alone surely have not yet experienced how to be fully happy. They have, perhaps, never realized yet that being single does not necessarily mean being empty. It is having a relationship with the self. Because you are well attuned to yourself, you know your needs. Those who do not have a healthy relationship with the self will always find the faults of the world instead of appreciating its many charms.
To be alone means to tread the path to self-realization, to nurture the road to enlightenment, to traverse the discovery of self-actualization. It is perhaps because of these that the word single-blessedness came into existence.
To be single and alone also means to be alive. It does not connote that the highway to the happily-ever-after is a far-fetched idea. The concept of "he" or "she," as oppose to "they," live(s) happily ever after is a congruent realization for someone whose fairy tale land is not peopled by any character but himself or herself only. Loving yourself to wholeness can be achieved even if you're alone. Lest you forget, you owe it to yourself to create your own happiness.
Single and alone? Fret not. Feel free to love yourself.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
I am Turning Two...
I am turning two years old in Lotus tomorrow and I'm not sure what to feel. There were still a lot of people when I started there, a lot of Indians and engineers but now, people are leaving left and right. Too bad that they're mostly my friends/hang out buddies. I can't help not to feel sad to see this company go like this. I should have listened to my friends when they told me to detach myself from coworkers and treat work as work so that I won't feel affected when people leave and when things go wrong. But what can I do, my work eventually becomes my life and it still is now. What do you expect when you spend even more than 40 hours of your week with these people? It's hard not to build personal connections with them especially for a person like me who got here almost three years ago all by myself.
Oh well, too bad for me coz I also fell for a coworker who left the company last week. What's funny is that he has been complaining about the company even before we started dating and yet he said goodbye to me or "us" first before he could say goodbye to Lotus. Maybe I shouldn't compare myself to Lotus because money is so much different with love. I shouldn't complain too coz as my friend said, when things were going great and you were happy, working together was an advantage coz you got to spend more time together and to see each other even when work was hectic.
Looking back, things have changed a lot as how I started but definitely, I have learned a lot in my line of work, I have gained the respect and trust that I need at work and I also learned some in another aspect of my life. I just hope that things get better and eventually these new businesses will prosper. People may come and go but there are some who will never be forgotten and who will leave a mark in our lives. Oh, one thing similar about my current situation and two years ago is that I'm mending a broken heart... and just like the last time, it will eventually heal at the right time. :)
Oh well, too bad for me coz I also fell for a coworker who left the company last week. What's funny is that he has been complaining about the company even before we started dating and yet he said goodbye to me or "us" first before he could say goodbye to Lotus. Maybe I shouldn't compare myself to Lotus because money is so much different with love. I shouldn't complain too coz as my friend said, when things were going great and you were happy, working together was an advantage coz you got to spend more time together and to see each other even when work was hectic.
Looking back, things have changed a lot as how I started but definitely, I have learned a lot in my line of work, I have gained the respect and trust that I need at work and I also learned some in another aspect of my life. I just hope that things get better and eventually these new businesses will prosper. People may come and go but there are some who will never be forgotten and who will leave a mark in our lives. Oh, one thing similar about my current situation and two years ago is that I'm mending a broken heart... and just like the last time, it will eventually heal at the right time. :)
Friday, June 08, 2007
Another Night that I Chose to Write Instead of Sleep
I didn't really think I'm that lazy when it comes to cleaning my personal e-mail inbox/outbox but it serves its purpose. I looked back at the letters that I sent to my friends and special people, and I realized that I'm in so much better position now than I was two years ago. I also read a letter that I guess when I was writing really hurt so much but now, it doesn't feel anything at all. I guess time heals all wounds and it's not always going to be a not so good situation. There's always sunshine after the rain. Just like the weather, there's winter, spring, summer or fall and you have to wear the right clothes for each season to feel better and comfortable.
No matter how tough my situation is, I'll get by. No matter how it hurts at times , at least I will have no regrets coz I always try to give my best in love. I know myself and I guess I was able to love a person much coz I had so much love inside of me to give. All I have to do now is focus on myself and love me.
One shouldn't under estimate the capability of the heart. It knows when to love, when to give up, when to heal and when to start anew.
No matter how tough my situation is, I'll get by. No matter how it hurts at times , at least I will have no regrets coz I always try to give my best in love. I know myself and I guess I was able to love a person much coz I had so much love inside of me to give. All I have to do now is focus on myself and love me.
One shouldn't under estimate the capability of the heart. It knows when to love, when to give up, when to heal and when to start anew.
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Definitely Not an Artist
Artists express their moods through their work of art and sometimes they can even create a masterpiece when they are sad or even mad. I'm definitely not an artist so this is what happened when I tried to play with brushes, paints and shirt. It's my abstract, hahaha. I kinda felt better after doing this.
My interpretation: A kinda messed up colourful life. The good thing is I've still got the colours.
I Heart Me
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I think I got my smile back. This is me, fresh from washing my face. :) I'm beginning to love myself again...Friday, June 01, 2007
Maybe I'm an Addict...
Alright, most people love to drink, smoke and party but I love CONVERSE. Maybe I'm an addict but shopping is a good therapy plus I got this pair for only $29.99 from $50.00. Shoot me guys! I'm bad.
Oh by the way, eating used to be my other addiction but not anymore. I'm back to being a size 2, yipee!!!
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